Topic: Stunned and Speechless

[cafeRg]

Shoesie

Sam Peckinpah, correct? ..hmmm a poem 'bout Kentucky Stills ..interesting.

                                                 

[champagne_shoes]

Be that as it may.
May that as it be.

I did not enjoy the 24 hours earlier. If you ask me, I will tell you why. However, I would far rather let it go.
Now

if you could write about Kentucky's most peculiar Dry Laws and Divisions
that would interest me greatly.

Something about you conjures the ghost of Sam Peckinpah.
I loved everything about the original Straw Dogs.
Did you?

[cafeRg]

First let me ask why you didn't enjoy 24 hours earlier?

Earlier I mentioned that the poem didn't have anything
to with the Bedroom but it did, after thinking about it and
of the Decorator. I thought the 24 Hours Earlier line was
a nice twist. I tried to walk the edge of erotic.

But please teach me, what is your story on that?

Hmm.. write a poem about dry counties, which I live in one.
We have to go to the County Line. Maybe I could say the Wild
Bunch come to Kentucky and shoots up all the opposing church people 

Yes I loved Straw Dogs!

Thanks for replying.

[cafeRg]

   any parting suggestions?

                     

[Kay]

well, yes! I read the poem over and over and I didn't see anything about

24 hours earlier

   any parting suggestions?

                     

[cafeRg]

Hi Kay

..didn't see anything about it? ..what does that mean, please?


                           

[Kay]

I thought the 24 Hours Earlier line was
a nice twist. I

the phrase, its not in the poem, so I didn't get why it was

being discussed. You know, this phrase:

24 hours earlier

was it revised?  help I'm so lost.

[cafeRg]

no that line is still in it..

a bit of Hollywood play in the poem..

revision 3

The Interior Decorator

Walking through the gray swinging doors
the air filled with smoke,  reminiscent of a
shipwrecked fog. The barmaid, dressed in
tight jeans, announces, your pheromones
precede you. I smile as she slides me
my usual, whiskey over rocks. Motioning for
her to lean over. I whisper in her ear, you
smell absolutely enticing and kiss her cheek.

Wayne, a gentle hulk, Let me buy his drink
then he asks me about his ex wife, an
interior decorator, working on my Center
St office. Did you contract Joyce to decorate
your bedroom interior too? I was stunned
speechless, thinking how does he know that?

24 Hours Earlier

A single candle flame glimmered to her rhythmic
movement, as seen by the shadows on the wall.
Groping; charges of utopia consumed our lusty
bodies. Collapsing like a feather. Cuddling with
candied kisses.

Getting dressed, she pulls her tanned silky
stockings up curvy legs pointing to the
heavens. Her white designer dress falls slowly
covering a petite voluptuous body. As she walks
toward my bedroom door, turns, in a soft voice,
I'll have to come back this weekend. Blows me
a kiss, looks at my drabby walls and says,
maybe something Eros.

[Kay]

If you say so!  It must be elsewhere...

in the thread   thanks   ..nite