Author Topic: FOUND POEMS  (Read 8114 times)

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Offline absurdal

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #14 on: October 31, 2010, 03:59 PM »
thank God for their wrong prredictions--or I don't believe I'd be typing this....


          WATCHTOWER DOOMSDAY PREDICTIONS

1874  Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the return of
                   Jesus Christ and End of World Armageddon

1878  Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the return of
                   Jesus Christ and End of World Armageddon 


1881  Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the return of
                   Jesus Christ and End of World Armageddon
 
1910   Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the return of
                   Jesus Christ and End of World Armageddon


1914    Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the invisible return of   
                   Jesus Christ and  End of World Armageddon
                 
                   
                Computed from prophecy in book of Daniel:
                   Seven times 360 days equal 2520 days                                           
                   interpreted as representing 2520 years
                   measured from starting date 607 BCE
     

1918   Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the return of
                   Jesus Christ and End of World Armageddon


1925   Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the return of
                   Jesus Christ and End of World Armageddon


1975   Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the return of
                   Jesus Christ and End of World Armageddon
                   
Computed as the 6000th anniversary of the
                   creation of Adam in the Garden of Eden
                   in 4026 BCE
     

1994   Jehovah's Witnesses predicts the return of
                   Jesus Christ and End of World Armageddon
                   
                   Intrepreted Psalms 90:10 as definining the length
                   of a generation equal to 80 years. 
                   Since 1914 plus 80 equals 1994 
                   they predicted Armageddon would occur
                   around that year---
                   
                   ---Thus making sure no one else
                   
                would top their record of
                   most wrong doomsday predictions
                   currently holding at nine
.
                   
1995  Jehovah's Witnesses now claim they are out of the
                   prediction business. 
 
   
 
 
 
 
 

Offline Bill

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #15 on: November 04, 2010, 09:10 AM »
How to Kill A CD


This CD should
automatically
run
when inserted
into your CD-Rom
drive.
If the CD
automatically
does not
start
browse the CD
drive
and click on
auto
run
execute


witt

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #16 on: November 04, 2010, 01:15 PM »
Well done, Bill.



Offline Bill

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #17 on: November 05, 2010, 12:04 AM »
Witt,

Thanks.  But, really, thanks are due to the person who wrote those instructions, even thought it took me a while to parse them properly, trying to discern the proper arrangement so that the rhythm of the piece carried the message well enough for the reader to guage the ridiculous posture of the copy writer who composed the original wording.

But then, you know me...always chuckling.
Bill

Offline absurdal

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #18 on: November 06, 2010, 07:20 AM »
Nice job, Bill! The guy who wrote the instructions killed it. MP3  dug it's grave and buried it. 

Offline absurdal

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Re: FOUND POEM & Haiku
« Reply #19 on: November 15, 2010, 03:53 PM »
Every Animal A Trophy

(Minnesota hunter discussing
what a Trophy should really mean)
 
 
When we hunt
we must work hard,
we obey the law,
we are ethical, and
we are reverent.
 
Every animal
taken -young or
old, buck or doe,
calf or fawn -
is a  "trophy".
 
They are gifts
of the land
and when
receiving a gift
it is rude
to criticize or
refuse it



haiku:   



deer
bang
trophy

 


Offline absurdal

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #20 on: November 17, 2010, 06:07 AM »
 
 
     
 
 
 
 
 
Transhuman Takeover


(from online article
"how to create
your own virtual self")



Transhumans are
convinced that
in the future
we will upload
our minds
into a computer
 
Why wait?

 
At MyVirtualTwin
you create a chatbot
tuned to capture and
copy your personality--
using 20,000 questions
to build a complex model
 
You then instruct your bot
on your preferred answers
to particular questions.
 
It can also take your place
in instant messaging (IM)
by mining huge records
of human conversations
called "chat logs" that
copy your IM style
 
One transhuman
developed a
technique called
Personality Capture
that fits nicely with your
personalized chatbot
 
What better way to explore
your archived personality
than to talk to yourself..
 
You could store new versions
of yourself every few years
and see how you changed.
 
One word of caution:
To avoid confusion as to
whom you are talking to,
it is important that you ask
the so-called "person"
rude, private and
silly questions:
(all three criteria
have to be met)
 
if you get a logical,
reasonable answer
   it is a robot
 
If you get a simple
reply of confusion,
   it is a robot
 
If you get a long string
of unprintable words,
   it is a robot
 
Only humans can answer
these questions properly--
with stupidity, mixed with
confusion, mixed with..
 
Only humans
can mix answers.
 
You will welcome
this advice
when these
personality robots
start taking over

Offline eileenonguam

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #21 on: June 11, 2011, 03:44 AM »
Here's a poem found at a local bookstore's cafe. It's the tea menu. I added the last two lines.


Xanadu Exotic Teas

black dragon oolong
green dragon well
pan fired green
Madagascar vanilla
Mandarin cinnamon
night blooming jasmine
snow monkey plum
Maharajah's passion fruit
Po Lin peach
white orange spice
Moroccan mint
ruby chai

so many teas
so little time
"and at my back I always hear time's wingéd chariot hurrying near..."
                                                                                           -Andrew Marvel

witt

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #22 on: June 13, 2011, 08:24 AM »
Here's a poem found at a local bookstore's cafe. It's the tea menu. I added the last two lines.


Xanadu Exotic Teas

black dragon oolong
green dragon well
pan fired green
Madagascar vanilla
Mandarin cinnamon
night blooming jasmine
snow monkey plum
Maharajah's passion fruit
Po Lin peach
white orange spice
Moroccan mint
ruby chai

so many teas
so little time

I like this. I so enjoy the soothing process of brewing tea.




Offline eileenonguam

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Re: FOUND POEMS
« Reply #23 on: June 13, 2011, 09:14 AM »
Have you had those blooming flower teas?  It's like watching a ballet when the blossom opens up. Tea time!
"and at my back I always hear time's wingéd chariot hurrying near..."
                                                                                           -Andrew Marvel