Author Topic: Journal entry - 7.19.09  (Read 3497 times)

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Offline Soft Words

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Journal entry - 7.19.09
« on: July 19, 2009, 09:46 PM »
Death is the ultimate symptom of life.

Dear Death,

i do not wish to be your enemy -
but i am bound by oath and name
to defend against you
again and again.
i do not fear you for myself -
i'd welcome you with open arms
and make love to you if it were possible
when you came. at the very least
i'd smile welcomingly at you,
you dashing killah.

i fear to walk in one morning and find her dead
and the visitors list stays empty.
i fear to walk in on that most intimate of kisses -
hers and yours - and then have to pull you apart
and fight you for her.
i fear i shall win that fight and revert
to coming here in the morning and checking
the visitor's list with bated breath
to find you haven't come.
i fear i shall have to speak of your visit
to those who will hate you and me,
because you won and i lost
and i have no defence.
i fear i shall turn around and find you
just outside the door,
staying away because i'm with her,
and swooping in
once the conjunctions between her name
and mine are removed. you'll take her then,
but leave a big gaping hole
in my heart.

Just so you know.

Arti.


For the others: Two of my patients died in the ambulance on their way home this week. Just general thoughts - obviously, I've been mulling over death, morbidity and other comorbid things.
Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

Offline Mystic1

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Re: Journal entry - 7.19.09
« Reply #1 on: July 19, 2009, 11:01 PM »
Sorry to hear about your patients, Arti. But you know what they say about life...no one gets out of it alive. I'm glad to see you've gained a bit of perspective, and more than glad that your'e on our side. Keep up the good fight.

Gallow's Humor Me
I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not for our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.

Offline Soft Words

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Re: Journal entry - 7.19.09
« Reply #2 on: July 27, 2009, 10:25 PM »
We do what we can. So far as i can tell, my patients like me, which is good news. Makes that 4:00 am alarm and 5:15 am bus ride to the hospital sorta kinda worth it, though i do want to break the alarm clock every morning.

running to the laundry,
me.
Life isn't about waiting for the storms to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.